The task of finding and taking prints for my living room walls.

For the longest time now, I've been wanting my own pictures up on my wall. Not paintings, not big iron work, not framed art, but MY prints from MY pictures. I haven't had a good enough camera to do this, with the angle and the depth I've wanted, but.... now I do! :) My husband took me out today and I took several that I'm debating over.
I'm not much of a fan of landscape pictures. I think a lot of them are beautiful, for sure, most of them actually, but for me, it's just not my thing; not what I'm into. I love taking pictures of things. The other day, I took a billion and a half pictures of a soda can. With different angles, different lighting, different focus settings and so on. I LOVED it. And if I was brave enough, I would have probably saved a few to frame because I really thought they were something special. A little nontraditional, I realize, but really cool nonetheless.
I LOVE taking pictures and looking at pictures of buildings. I love the long angles of the pictures, when you're shooting them from below. So I've decided that those types are what I'm going to put on my wall. I think I've decided on a few hydrangea pictures (which I will name below), but these are a few of my favorite shots.

((click to enlarge))

((I guess this could be thought of as a "landscape", but I adore hydrangea's, so I had to take a few close ups))

((I think these are what I'm going to have printed and hang on my living room wall. I'm tempted to turn the hue to sepia, because plum doesn't really match my decor, but I haven't decided yet))

((I really love this one))

((This is obviously some kind of tree, but it's growing like a weed would grow. Not planted by a person, just a seed sprouting up and growing in such a strange spot! But I LOVED the pictures it produced, especially with the sun and shadows))

((My grandpa retired from the Greyhound Bus Depot in Eugene, and we were downtown today, so I snapped a few. I think I will probably frame this as a gift for him. I think he'd really love it))

((I loved playing around with the focus on my camera, now I'm totally into angles. This one is fast becoming my favorite angle))

((So so so handsome))

((Beautiful))

((Taylor running to catch up with the boys))

REPRESENT!!!!

((I loved the building reflection in this!))

Cookies make bad days better. :)

Today started as a great day! Slept in, made banana pancakes for breakfast, did some shopping, but then all plans fell apart and my day was pretty much ruined. :( I was pretty sad. So what better thing to do than make a ridiculous amount of cookies, right?! LOL!
I went to Safeway and picked up all my needed ingredients and let the kids pick out what kind of cookies they wanted to make. Jackson wanted peanut butter chocolate chip cookies; Taylor, white chocolate chip macadamia nut cookies. YUM!

((hehe, look at Tay's face!! <3))

((Think we have enough chocolate chips?!?! LOL!))

((They are all soooooooo good!!!))

((Daisey patiently waiting for a bite, hehe))

I noticed a visitor in the house today.

As I was making dinner, I noticed this pretty little (er, well, not so little! She was CHUNKY! hehe) ladybug on Jackson's vacation bible school plant (that were planted from seeds! They're growing great!).
I tried to pick it up to put it outside, but she was fast and ran all over the plant and then finally flew away. I later found her on the apples and was successful in putting her outside. :)
It surprised me that she was able to get in the house, find a plant (one of only TWO living plants in my house, the second one being Taylor's vbs plant, which is right next to this one, lol) and look like she was just going to set up shop here! It's funny how tiny animals can "think". At least I find that amusing. :)

((as always, these images are clickable to view enlarged.))

These are a few pictures I snapped today after these "messy" flowers caught my eye as I was sweeping and I realized how beautiful they were!

Contrast

Since I've gotten my new camera last week, I've been taking LOTS of pictures of the same thing twice. Once in focus with a blurry background and once with the background in focus and the subject blurry. I've been getting quite a few neat-o shots! ((hehe, I just said "neat-o"))

This is my favorite set so far.
(They're clickable to make larger.)

Family Day at The Ranch

Most of you who know me, know that we (my kids especially) go to "the ranch" a lot over the summer.

(This is the gravel road leading to the ranch, you can see my aunt and uncle's house way far in the background)

Starting last year, my grandpa started having a big family get together, lasting about a week, at the ranch. People come with their 5th wheels, tents, whatever, and stay up there for a day, a night, a few nights or the whole week. My grandparents live at the ranch too, and they absolutely LOVE having family over.

(My grandpa)

These next few lines are going to be hard for me to write. I'm going to be as honest as I can be.
I don't go to the ranch as often as I should.
I don't see my grandparents as often as I should. It's hard for me. I am overwhelmed with guilt and sadness when I think about the time I should be spending with them, my grandma especially, but I still don't change it.
My grandparents moved to the ranch a few years ago when my grandma's memory started to fade fast. She has been to several doctors, some say she has Alzheimer's, some say it's just dementia, and some say that it's from several mini strokes that she's had over the past few years. I'm sure the mini strokes are probably the main cause of her memory loss, at least in my non-doctor opinion.
My grandma and I have always been close. Really really close. When I was growing up, going and spending the night with them was such a treat for me and I did so well into my teenage years. She would get up at 5am, most mornings I would get up that early too with her. She'd make me Cream of Wheat, a little lumpy, just like I asked, with a pat of butter and some sugar with some toast. She'd read the paper, do her crossword and visit with me during my breakfast. We'd sit at the table and talk and talk and talk in the mornings that I stayed the night. I'd go to California with them to visit my aunts, uncle, cousins and great grandma and I so cherish those memories. We'd go to shopping, go on walks, eat Aunt Mary's amazing dinners but the memories that stand out most to me are the ones of us just talking.
Just visiting with each other.
Enjoying being together.
So why now do I not spend the time that I so desperately want to with her?
I can't bear it.
I can hardly hold back the tears when I see her.
She IS still my grandma and I love her dearly. The mini strokes have changed her though. Her physical appearance is even different. But I honestly love the person she is now, just as much as I love the person she used to be. But it's just hard for me to see her lose her memories. Of things, of people, of places, it breaks my heart. I feel like not spending the time I should be/want to be spending with her will protect my heart somehow. It makes no sense, I'm sure, but that's how I think of it. Even though I don't want to think that way. I'm trying to change my way of thinking. I'm trying to just breathe and realize that getting older and having health problems like she's having is just a way of life for some elderly people. It is what it is, and I have to CHOSE to make the best of it. I'm trying to, but as I keep saying, it's so hard.
It was especially hard for me yesterday. I arrived at the ranch and went to where all the family was visiting outside and I overheard my grandma ask my grandpa who I was. I can barely write this, as the tears are blurring my view. Granted, I look a LOT different than I have my whole life, I JUST got my hair cut in a very different and very short style. And as soon as my grandpa said who I was, she acted embarrassed and said something to the effect that "of course she knew who she is". I don't think anyone overheard that exchange besides myself and I didn't tell my mom or my husband or anyone just because I don't think I could actually say those words out loud.
"My grandma didn't recognize me."
No, I just don't think I can say them. It's hard enough to type them. I keep telling myself over and over that it was just because of my hair being so different and because I had my big sunglasses on. Yes, that's it. Nothing more. She wouldn't forget me. She couldn't forget me.
Right?

Whew - I didn't mean to make this a debbie downer blog. :) I guess what I'm trying to say and more importantly, say to myself is that I have a wonderful grandma, she's as sweet as they come, as funny as they come, someone who I will ALWAYS be close to, no matter what happens to her memory and I need to put my own hurt aside and know that she didn't chose this and that she wants to see me as much as I want to see her, and so I need to suck it up and spend time with her. I know in years to come I will appreciate the time I spend with her. I need to spend more time with her.
I love her so much that it feels like my heart will burst.

(My grandma and me)

I originally wrote this blog to share some pictures that I thought were pretty great from the ranch! :)
These are clickable, so you can click on them to see them bigger.


Taylor and Grace


Weeee!! :)


Jackson trying to catch the sheep so he can ride it. He's ALL boy! :)


My mom, me and Shannon :)


The kids playing in the creek.


My girl.


My boy.


Taylor posing - as usual. :)


Taylor and Grace giving themselves spa mud facials. :)

There are a lot more pictures here! Come check them out! :)